Sunday, January 21, 2007

Last week I went to the movies with some friends. I arrived late, so I didn't get the chance to watch Dejavu (I wanted to watch Children of Men). The most remarkable moment in the movie happened when Denzel Washington's character tells Jim Caviezel he's gona need KY at jail, and then a friend's girlfriend asked us whispering: "KY for what?". We all laughed for so long that we completely lost track of what was going on in the movie...

Anyway, when we were leaving the theatre, I noticed someone was staring at me. I looked back at him, and I didn't recognized him at first, but after a couple of seconds I realized it was a guy from high school we used to call "Dolphin" (I really don't remember why). He told me he had been working at the multiplex for a few months. I had been told by a friend that Dolphin had dropped out of the University after the first year (he was an Engineering student, like me), but I didn't really know what had happened to him, even though he only lives a block away from my house.
When we were in high school we used to hung out sometimes, but he was more into heavy drinking than I was, so we weren't really friends. And according to what I heard, he kept that partying attitude in College, so things didn't really worked out for him.

We didn't really get to talk too much, because there were a lot of people waiting in line, and he had to keep an eye on them. On my way home, I realized I was a little shocked, because he's a living example of what my parents gently mention as "failure", everytime I want to talk about my career doubts. I mean, I don't think working at a movie theatre is a bad thing at all, but it's just not what any of us imagined doing when graduating from High School.

I'm really scared about taking bad decitions. I mean, Your hole life is based on the decisions you make after you graduate from high school. Right now I'm just thinking about how unhappy I feel by studying engineering, but will I feel fulfilled as a film director knowing I'll have to beg people to finance my movie? If the arts major doesn't work, then what? I guess what scares me the most of endind up working at a movie theatre isn't the job itself, but knowing that it'd be too far from the dreams I had when I finished High School.

But no more thinking. University starts again tomorrow, so it's time of acting. No more doubts, no more preocupations. I'm finally going to be responsable for my actions!!! ...or at least i'll try.

1 comment:

Stephen said...

okay... so i totally appreciate that things may be different in columbia, but the reality of the situation is what you do in uni is such a minor factor in what you do / become.

there are countless people who never went to HS or university and are totally successful.

i have 3 degrees and i dont use any of them.

my kid brother got his degree and then decided to make guitars for a living (very poor and very happy).

our parents (most people from the previous generation) are bound to some notion of 'the right path' and think that one size fits all...

you might b an engineer or director and be totally miserable.

your HS friend might work at a theater and be totally happy.

all that said... you are 19 and in the closet. think about how your life will change (hopefully all for the better) in the years to come.

you are sure to get older and wiser.

you may come out (not an easy thing in any south american country).

you will, likely, finish uni and get a job that you may or may not like.

all these things will change your perception of yourself and the direction you are going.

so... good advice... stay in school. work hard. dont take life so seriously. and above all else... be in the now (dont dwell on the future).